Monthly archives "December 2014"

You won’t me sucking Dick on the corner?

 

Seeing pink elephants

Iya Modupe, my aunt has a catchy greeting when you ask her how she’s doing? And it’s been a great source of inspiration. She often responds, by saying, ” I’m one step away from the hoe stroll!” “Bout to be an old hoe?” Now hear me clearly, she wasn’t serious but she was serious! Add my Yeye to the mix and her favorite line was and still is ” By Hook or Crook!”, Oh so,  not only- are we -willing to sell ass, we robbing too? My mother and my Aunt are both law-abiding citizens and neither have the temperament to be prostitutes (they way too ignorant, a john might get they ass beat for putting sweaty balls on their chins) and they would make terrible inmates!

The apple don’t fall far from the tree so over the years, when I find myself in tight spots or I can’t seem to get the molasses out my ass, I have a little pep talk with myself and I say to myself, “You won’t me sucking Dick on the corner?” I quickly, respond, “NO!” Honestly, for a slight minute, I ask myself, “Could you really do it!” and I have to face reality-I have a bad attitude so prostituting is out of the question but I’ve met many men who tell me if they had a PUSSY they would never be broke!

So I said, all this to say that you have to be careful what you say because during  one of my pep talk days, the funniest and strangest thing happened. I was having some cash flow issues and the guy I was dating had decided to try and use some behavior modifications tactics on me, ( I will explain those shenanigans later and clarify further why Dick Diets are badddd) anyway that Ratbastard lost his mind and I had to go out and purchase a new phone and get a new phone number and what do you know.

I received the number of a prostitute who had ads on Craigslist with a heavy clientage who was a mother of an elementary school boy who was also on public assistance-I not only received calls  from her “Dudes”  but everybody and they mama as Yeye would say looking for her and willing to tell me all her  business; despite me telling all the callers they had the wrong number. My new phone rang off the hook for weeks, when I told the Johns, I wasn’t in the business, they still propositioned me. So there I was with a clientele already made up for me waiting for the opportunity to literally be sucking Dick for money! That day, I had to tell the Universe I wasn’t serious and had a great big belly aching laugh!

And to this day, I at least get 2 calls a month and sometimes random pictures of men looking for a good time! Now hear me clearly, I am an advocate for sex workers, I myself just don’t have the correct disposition needed for the job!

What have you manifested with your words? Start the conversation, leave a comment.

What would Jesus do?

Ancestors' Altar. Mahayana Buddhist Temple.

I wasn’t raised Christian so when I turned 17, my mother started trying to make us go to church, of course my brothers and I thought she had lost her mind, hell she even made us get baptized, not the kind when they dunk you in a lake or a pool of water, the sprinkle kind.

Given my mother’s circumstances, she had lost her mind, we will discuss that at another time,  we were mostly sleeping in church- bored as hell and as time went on, my brothers’ and I began to find some solace in going to church once we found out the Pastor was a cuss in Minister.

Oh, yes, Reverend Murray, cussed people out on a regular and this delighted me and my brothers-who knew? Holy and cussing went hand in hand, even in the pulpit, he would be cussing folks out under his breath. It was refreshing, a man of the cloth, knew that, sometimes you caint get people to do shit or cooperate unless you get loud, start cussing and get ignorant.

Now don’t get me wrong, the man, had power and influence in the community, he was brilliant and smart-like Jesus, he was not to holy to get grime sometimes. According to the good book, Jesus liked to hang out with the undesirables and was an outlaw-sounds way more interesting than the rigid, stale, version of Jesus- you get today and we won’t even talk about get down wit the get down Moses!

But I digress, what was even more tantalizing was the fact that his wife was not the usual suspect of a first lady, on the contrary, Oh, I heard whispers about her and was delightfully surprised when we finally met and she looked like she had just step out of a grunge country garden magazine-she was tall and beautiful, yet she tried to hide her beauty behind a pair of over-all’s.

Yes, the first lady was in over-all’s  during church services, while 98% of the women were dressed to the nines-if my assumptions are correct trying to get the Pastors or some other man in the church with a powerful positions attention to get what I like to call a “Dick Healing!” And guess what she had a mouth like a sailor, a I don’t give a fuck attitude, and a yea so I’m his wife and he’s the pastor but he’s still a man attitude, along with I’m not trying to impress nobody….shiit -I’m the prize. Talk about a walking contradiction of your typical first lady-yet I loved her and thought she was Regal because she really liked herself.

You heard me, I said, “Dick Healing”, not that I ever heard Pastor Murray being accused of any  “Dick Healing”, however, we’ve all heard of all the scandals about Ministers, Priests, Reverend, Babalawos, and other men in spiritual leadership who have used their power and penis’ on their followers. I am always on the look out for someone trying to perform one on me and let’s not even discuss the other types of scoundrels-who are looking for the next prey offering a “Dick Healing!”

Anyway, where was I, Oh, yes-Pastor Murray was lucky to have a wife, who defined herself by her own terms. My Yeye eventually gave up on making us go to church because we were only going for the best fried chicken you ever tasted and for a glimpse of the rebel rouser behavior depicted by Jesus in the bible.

Tell your own story, leave a comment.

that right there

Personification of Japan

Might point exactly check out what Jim Brown has to say about Personal Accountability  on the Zo What Morning Show. I found what he had to say-after the introduction and statement of- Tim Wise- profound because he has had a history of wrapping knuckles around womens’ foreheads! Will Ray Rice be so profound in his AARP ages????

What do you think about what Tim Wise perspectives? Leave a comment!

In search of….. doctor-fix my horny!!!

Studio shot of belly dancer in sensual pose

I’m still searching for the feature I saw, where women in Asia were going to the doctor to have orgasms. JuJu Mama progressive love siren brings a provocative perspective and  Sex Expert dispels the myth of soccer moms being boring , both of these vixens are hot and brilliant.

Start the conversation, leave a comment, what is your take on this topic?

 

Sometimes parents’ don’t know shit!!

I remember Spike Lee receiving an award and he thanked his grandmother for believing in him and helping him pursue his film career. His grandmother used  her own money to back him. One of the remarkable truths that he spoke during his acceptance speech was that, “Parents are the biggest dream killers!” The cameras and audience sort of glossed over what he said because it was a hurtful truth, and it felt like you had been slapped, leaving one feeling uncomfortable and raw- that many people, if honest with themselves, let their dreams die before they could take root, blossom and thrive because their own parents had robbed them out of their dreams due to their own insecurities, sometimes outright jealousy and that ever present vigilant Lack Monster, the list could go on and so I invite you to revisit your dreams because they are tied to your destiny and your parents never had the authorization to take you off your path so reclaim your dreams and your life and see where it leads you.

Had or have any dream killers in your life, leave a comment!

Same shit different day

Syringe injecting globe

When we returned to Los Angeles from Oyotunji, I felt as if I were in the Twilight Zone, the atmosphere was chaotic, confusing, dead, and on edge. The consciousness of so many people I encountered was unnerving, the pessimism, the bleak attitude, the confusion of identity left me scratching my head and eventually I stopped speaking of what I knew. The one thing that angers me and still angers me to this day, is the collective consciousness that it is ok to suffer and wait because one day we will be rescued.

This idea that someone else is going to come and do the work for you. I watched an entire generation of urban black youth be thrown to the wolves or the proverbial throwing your hands up, “we don’t know what to do with these boys”  so many of my friends died and the ones who lived -as early as 12 years old began the cycle of going to prison, this was the result of throwing your hands up.

Each day, I wonder about all the boys and girls we lost due to negligence because the generation before us had abandoned us in exchange for what I am not sure. For those of us that survived the bloody and violent times of the Crack Era, we are truly miracles, we found a way to live and cope, however most if not all of us never express or talk about the trauma imposed on us due to neglect by our own community members.

That being said, here me clearly, ain’t nobody coming to save you, and ain’t nobody gone think more of you than you think of your dawn self. You are your own salvation, and the same Universal God that created the Sun, the Moon, and the Stars created you. So when I start to feel less than for any reason, I remind myself, “that no man makes the Sun come up!” Thank God because if man could, his ornery ass would have all of us sitting in the dark from ego tripping.

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