A hard head makes a soft ass


A hard head makes a soft ass! American- African proverb

19 Jul 1938, Hollywood, Los Angeles, California, USA --- Original caption: When a Film Player "Blows Up" Before Camera. Hollywood, California: Sometimes a film player makes a scene in front of the camera not exactly called for the script. Labeled "blow ups" these scenes usually occur after the player has "muffed" a line -- that is, said the wrong thing at the wrong time. Exasperated, the player may grimace, snap his fingers, or go into tantrums. Photo shows Lola Lane, Warner Bros. player, muffs a line and is pictured catching her breath after the shock of realizing that she ruined a scene. --- Image by © Bettmann/CORBIS

I am a visionary. It’s both a gift and a curse. The gift and the curse part is I can see the entire picture, from start to finish. I am able to clearly visualize all the problems and solutions that will arise from the beginning of the journey until the end. However, my biggest problem and frustration is getting other people to see and understand what I see.

I can walk into a room and let’s say there are 7 people working on finding a solution to a problem. More likely than not, they have been trying to figure things out for months or longer. Keep in mind, I can walk in and almost immediately see the entire picture tell them what’s wrong, all the possible solutions, the pathways to get there and ways to mitigate and avoid risks and dangers along the way . You would think it would be met with applause and gratitude but initially its met with resentment because most times people have been waiting on a pathway to a solution and my presentation of the information comes out of my mouth so matter of fact and quickly. More importantly, everything I say is going to happen-happens.

My visionary gifts or skills have been mislabeled as being bossy. As a result, I’ve given up how people respond to the information and I step aside and when things come to pass I try not to say, ” I told you so!” I’ve come to the conclusion I am not bossy-I’m Impatient! Because I have the gift of sight and can see clear pathways it makes me want to move, to get shit done and over with-problem is I’m taking other people along with me and Opposition and Resistance takes over.

The profound shock and awe that I am met with after things come to pass from the very folks in opposition and resistance is enough to make me hawk spit. I think if only they would listen, we could avoid all the shenanigans, get things done and have our desired results, oh but no, we must need to encounter all necessary bullshit from start to finish that the journey takes much longer to complete.

I would often grow angry and feel ignored and feel even more resentment when people would come to me and tell me I was right, REALLY, I would think with a turned up lip and the side eye. Over time, I began to realize that I did not have the language to help people see the vision. I learned through time that I was the one with the vision and it was merely my responsibility to give the message, now rather they listened or not was not on me!

I often think of ancient stories and holy leaders trying to get people to listen to get people out of all their bad circumstances. I could not have ever been holy or a God because I would envision handling people’s obstinacy to  the way Nigerians in Lagos, handle people who cause accidents. (talk about mastering the pimp hand slap with the speed and accuracy of a master chef slicing abilities that it could be labeled an art form)

It brings to mind the story of Moses and the Exodus and had I been Moses I would have left folks wandering in the wilderness with all their moaning, bitching and complaining, opposition and resistance. I would have told God,  ” I’m done, you gon have to send somebody else to lead them, they just to dam hard-headed for me!” Alhammad Lillah, I no longer get angry when people refuse to heed the warnings or the directions.

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