Monthly archives "August 2016"

It’s like salt baybee!

It’s ok.. to choose yourself sometime-Arielle Estoria

 

 

Now when I heard about the movement MGTOW and wrote about it, well not quite wrote about it-I more like mentioned it without using it’s proper name because a) It was started by white men and I prefer to talk about things and people I know personally. Seeing as I am not a white man I didn’t think I had the authority to speak about the issues or movement directly. Secondly, I do not have a penis so what do I know about what it means to be a man in this world. From my limited perspective it seems that there are privileges that come with having a penis and privileges that come from being white. Regardless I honor all those who have the courage to speak about their pain.

Again I can only speak from my own experiences and from far as I can tell Penis Privileges exist in the community I’m from. Am I going to go down the list of experiences that I been a witness to, no. I’m not one to whine about inequalities in life, however I do talk shit occasionally. I don’t make up the rules and if I did I’m certain that I would have some favorites now could I see myself just going around fucking with people for fun and sport I don’t think so because I abhor bullies.

As I said before I indirectly wrote a piece about it or rather  about one of their complaints about women and it’s a complaint many men have not just white men but all men so after battling insomnia for several nights I ran across some YouTube channel talking about a significant amount of Black Women  adopting the MGTOW movement and I cringed and listened to the brothers’ sensitive and empathetic response to the frustrations that have led to the adoption of Black Women spring boarding their movement off of the MGTOW movement. Now hear me clearly, in life I believe you need to spend time by yourself especially after traumas and heartbreak. However, I do not encourage anyone going it alone for ever or taking a go for it with the mindset that the grass is greener on the other side. Because, truth be told we take ourselves to each stop and destination in life.

Listen I have been black female my entire life and I know all the ugly and beauty that comes from being  Black & Female in America. I got a list of injustices, heart ache and pain behind being black & female in America and since I know what it’s like to live without running water, electricity, indoor plumbing and a toilet with all the injustices black folks have endured and survived non-stop I am grateful and thankful to be an American. Since I know my heritage didn’t start with chattel slavery and since I comforted by the fact these Ratbastards do not make the Sun come up everyday I like to keep an optimistic view on life despite all the suffering life can bring on. And since I know life puts its foot up everybodies asses regardless to race, class or countrymen I also realize that some people get it worse than others as the universal Law of Relativity puts it.

With that being said, I had enough heart ache and heart break in my life to write enough songs to become a platinum country singer yet the only thing I regret is not having someone with some dawn sense to help me navigate life being a female. My grandmother died in my early 20’s and thank God she gave me a lot of wisdom and sage. She gave it to you straight lace no chase and although she left me with wisdom during my journey I caught amnesia because she was no longer here to help me navigate this life and sad to say there were not many in my mother’s generation I could turn to who had some sense to guide me along the way so I know that gap has caused so much damage causing many of us to lose our way and never make it back on the path.

Some shit is hard to recover from and some shit you never get over, with this in mind, the greatest lesson I’ve learned from my mother’s generation is not to become a Bitter Betty, not to allow life to take you down that you forget what joy looks like and feels like. That you let yourself go and only hold on to the memories of all the niggas who have dogged you including ya own daddy. You got to dig deep and remember the pretty girl who lives inside you who used to love to hula hoop and play double Dutch…… remember the songs and chants

Check out number 24

hell yea

I said um,

He fine

hell yea

And I know he look good

OR

Teda ball, teda ball

ooosha asha,

teda ball, teda ball

ooosha asha

My name is mika

Super cool

You mess with me

You a fool

I got this boy on my mind

Loving

Hugging

Kissing

All the time

Straight that he’s mine!!!

Oh how we forget  the power of a Stomp and Shake. We forget to Shake shit off, Shake shit out, and Shake folks…… why ya bullshitn….my own Yeye taught me my first stomp and shake chants as a little girl, Value and keep those things you learn in your living room that your mother and other women teach you that bring joy, flavor and taste to your life-it’s like salt baybee!

Cruising for a bruising

 

Mental illness is running rampant in American society regardless of race, sex, and or class. But sometimes the folks who are labeled “Crazy” may in fact be the most sane in any group. Often times the person labeled ” Crazy!” in the family or a group are used as scapegoats. And then there is the more sinister scenarios of when the person labeled crazy refuses to go along to get along and if you’re the odd man out chances are you will be classified as ” Crazy!”

And then there is the person labeled ” Crazy!” who has simply reached a point where they have had enough! As if reaching the point where you have tolerated enough bullshit sincerely equates being labeled ” Crazy” when in reality a boundary has been established once a person has reached their limit in tolerating the now intolerable…… in the words of Popeye, ” That’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more!”

You would think being stupid would trump being crazy. Yet somehow it seems reasonably acceptable to be stupid but God forbid being ” Crazy!” When do we ever focus on the chronic line breakers, the folks who seem not to understand boundaries and yet more times than not the focus is on the person whose unable to clearly define or draw the line so it’s clear as to where it resides. And once the tipping point is reached-the chronic line breaker after having their asses ripped a new, usually stand by looking shocked often times saying, ” What did I do?” As if they are some 3 year old unable to comprehend that they had been, ” Cruising for a bruising!” for sometime now, yet the person unable to say, ” Here’s the line and do not cross it, is the one often labeled ” Crazy!” Because they had pushed themselves beyond the point of tolerance,

You got to know where the lines before it’s crossed!

 

 

 

 

 

Dr. Sebi

 

“Fuck you if you didn’t think I was gon make it!” is what , the cake read. I remember reading the words on the cake to myself and my eyes lit up from the beautiful vulgarity and at the same time I fell in love because, it’s declaration was so bold, so poetic, so arrogant, so sovereign and wild. I hadn’t yet lived long enough or endured enough to fully grasp what it meant, yet I wasn’t so naïve that I didn’t understand it was a Victory Celebration.

The celebration from the sparkled crew held my attention although I attempted to keep my eye on Beanie Man as he skipped across the floor. Elephant Man was off the hook but not as off the hook as the “Fuck you if you didn’t think I was gon make it!” party. It has  stuck out in my head for years. The Jamaican crew was mad cool and I admired and was proud of their declaration of victory and so with great honor and with slight sadness I started to say Rest in Peace Dr. Sebi but then I remembered energy can neither be created or destroyed, rather it transforms from one form to another so that means the spirit and energy of Dr. Sebi lives on. I would like to think Dr. Sebi could and would appreciate a “Fuck you if you didn’t think I was gon make it!” party- considering all the victories he accomplished using pure common sense!

 

to*mor*row

Tomorrow-on the day after today-adverb

Tomorrow- the day after today-noun

 

 

For an extended amount of time something had been telling me to take a Krav Maga class. The voice was continuance-although,  I kept ignoring it until I lay flat on my back with someone laying on me on top of me weighing a good 200 pounds. As I lay helpless on the ground with this person laying on me I recalled the voice in my head and once I got up off the ground I thought this is why Krav Maga would have come in handy.

I will have to go into details about the entire shenanigans another time (God willing) because my left hand is not functioning because I finally went and took a class and my partners’ right foot put my left hand out of commission and I am typing this post with one hand. I don’t feel that bad because there were more men in the class than women and they all were struggling just as much as I was. The female partner I had was a beast and if you should meet her in an alley and she kicks you in the balls-you will lose the ability to produce children!

As I struggle to write this post with one hand, I am reminded that I almost self-sabotaged myself out of taking the class. These are the words that kept me focused and moving through all resistance and apprehension about taking the class……….

 

” Nobody ever touched a tomorrow in life, nobody ever experienced one, nobody ever saw one. Not because it’s out of reach because it doesn’t exist!

” You can only imagine tomorrow! You can only behold now, you can never behold tomorrow!”

” Tomorrow is a dream that will never come true! You can only imagine tomorrow.”

” You can know life only today. You can know life only now, the moment”

” Life and death will happen today!”

” Tomorrow never happened to anybody but the idea of tomorrow has robbed people!”

” Just the idea completely robs people of everything that could be life!”

” Most lives are not a reality, they’re just a psychological existence, they’re just a dream!”-Sadhguru