Category "Keep Livin"

The faces etched in our hearts

There are days when sadness cannot be treated like you treat someone you are trying to love from a long handed spoon. And having no expectations seems highly unlikely and makes no sense at all if you come from the school of God shows up and shows out. Not having expectations seems like having no faith or hope and as I write this I see Shannon’s face, his beautiful charcoal black skin and the face of an old blues singer when he sat quiet and how he looked like a Senegalese boy playing drums when he laughed. Shannon was my ex-husband’s best friend from childhood and although as teenagers and young adults he rarely spoke and everything he said was a whisper like wind on your cheeks, I miss him and will never fully understand how such a gentle person could be shot and killed. And I wonder if all the dead bodies and empty spaces in our hearts are why it is so hard for us to love one another and get along. More importantly, I wonder how often Shannon’s mother thinks of him and if she knows that I cry for him for her.



What other uses are newspapers good for?

I grew up without running water, electricity, gas, and a toilet. Walking to the well  several times a day to get water with my crying cousin trailing me , using kerosene lanterns wasn’t so bad because I liked the burning smell. Taking a bath outside even in the Winter’s was not as bad as using an out house. Imagine being 4 years old with your small legs swinging as you looked down a long hole filled with shit. I can still remember the terror of falling in the shit below. The fall into the pit of shit would have been long……can you imagine being terrified that you might drown in shit!!1 The smell of an outhouse never goes away, the flies, the shit, the smell. You get the point……so when I think of people world-wide who do not even have outhouses to use, I almost want to faint. I had a preoccupation with my bowel movements since then, always looking and checking the toilet, probably some subconscious effort of both relief and gratitude that the only shit in the toilet was mine.

Remember, I’m 4 years old, looking through my legs at the community poop, ugh, yuk, I said all this to say, that there are millions of people without toilets and I more than feel sorry for them, I feel complete outrage. At the same time, I am not only happy and grateful about my indoor toilet………can you say that I am orgasmic about toilet paper. Yes even the hard shit that is as rough as roll of brown paper towel… know the kind they use in grade school. So I sincerely hope the next time you get to take a dump in your own indoor toilet, the public restroom, ya mama’s toilet, whose ever toilet, you begin to know that we are blessed.

What would you do if you didn’t have a toilet to use? Leave a comment below.